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Heroic Knight
 
Group: Basic Members
Last Login: Friday, August 20, 2010 11:53 PM
Posts: 169,
Visits: 297
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Okay, in a bid for a bit of a laugh in the Maelstrom off-season, I present to you...
Maelstrom Filk Feud!
For those who don't know, a "filk" is when you take a well-known song and replace some of the words with your own in order to make it related to something else.
Okay, the rules are simple:
1) Post a filk to this thread. In order to win prizes, this should be a BAD FILK - good filks score no prizes, we're looking for entertainment here, not art. If you could sing it in-character without people stabbing you with tent pegs, then it's too good.
2) Your filk must be related to maelstrom setting, or at least larping in general.
3) Filks that are over eight lines of a song are automatically disqualified - this is the internet people! (Being a denizen of the internet, I lose interest in anything I couldn't fit onto a beermat. Tldr.)
4) Filks that I think are particularly terrible and hilarious will win a FABULOUS PRIZE. The prize will be a cartoon picture of a duck. Every winner will get a different duck.
5) My decision on who I give ducks to is final. They're my ducks, I can give them to who I want to.
6) Simply replacing two, or more of the words with "Gin Tang" does not count. It's too easy. As a result, Gin Tang songs will not qualify for ducks, but if I find them funny then you may win a consolation cartoon of a catbus. No catbuses will be awarded for songs I already did this to.
I suppose an example is in order.
I don't drink Vodka, I drink rum my dear.
I wear a cutlass by my side.
You can hear it in my accent when I talk.
I'm Malathian in Yugorsk.
LET THE GAME BEGIN.
PD - Mica, the Spine Of The World.
CUTT - NOT THE HEAD REF
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Champion
Group: Basic Members
Last Login: Monday, August 02, 2010 4:04 PM
Posts: 357,
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| Alright, I'll bite. Oh, my old man's Frieboden
He wears a wool sock hat
He brews some barmy potions
And he lives in a Flembic flat
He looks a proper narner
When his musket he does shoot
He takes so long to load the thing
The stock has since grown roots
__________________________
1) Boys hit each other with sticks for the fun of it
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Heroic Knight
Group: System Moderators
Last Login: Yesterday @ 7:19 PM
Posts: 128,
Visits: 338
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Those of you unfortunate enough to have been within earshot of the hilariously bad "Hunahpa Cultural Evening" at event four last year may have been treated to one of several a capella renditions of this beauty. We made up for lack of being in tune with vigour and enthusiasm, which cover a multitude of sins.
(edited to add: yes, I know, it's long. Live with it.)
With apologies to Pete Townsend, who wrote it, and the Ukelele Orchestra of Great Britain, who inspired the choral version...
Ever since I was a young one,
I've played the Sacred Ball;
From Sath Agwa to Bendal Dolum
Must have played 'em all,
But I ain't seen nothing like him
On any carven Wall -
That slave from the temple
Sure plays mean court ball.
He stands like a statue
And joins the sacred scene;
Dodges the defenders,
his getaways are clean
Plays by intuition
as the macahuitls fall -
That slave from the temple
Sure plays mean court ball.
He's a court ball lizard
there has to be a twist
A court ball lizard
He's made the sacred list...
How do you think he does it
(We don't know)
What makes him so good?
(Toad!)
He ain't got no distractions,
Ignores those shouts and yells;
Don't see no fangs a-flashing,
plays like fiend from hell;
Always makes the tough catch
scores from off the wall
That slave from the temple
Sure plays mean court ball.
I thought I was
The court ball king
But I just handed
the feathered crown to him
Even in my favourite ball court
He can beat my best
so the priesthood lead him to the altar
- you can guess the rest.
He had sacred power in him
and now it's there for all
That slave in the temple
Sure played mean court ball.
----
All opinions, comments and views expressed in Rule7 posts are mine, or have been sufficiently well plagiarised that you'll never tell the difference. They may be well-informed, educated guesses or pure speculation, but they certainly do not represent any official Odyssey or PD position. As with all PD matters, definitive positions regarding Odyssey issues are best sought direct from PD through the usual official channels. Accept no substitutes!
PD - Odyssey: Campaign, Story & Quest PD - Maelstrom: Doctor Gabriel Pretorius (Ph.D Ch.D Saren), Rimici Capell Future Prospects Group
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Champion
Group: Basic Members
Last Login: Yesterday @ 7:37 PM
Posts: 319,
Visits: 3,802
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Here's a seasonal little ditty I just dashed off, remembering a certain punishment at the last event with fondness... I think it satisfies the above criteria of being a)short b)bad.
Beating Jean de Winter
Rocks will make him moan
Hit him with an iron
That will make him groan
Blood is falling, blood on blood,
Blo-o-od on blood
Beating Jean de Winter
Makes us all feel good
RL: Daisy
Maelstrom: Piper Arteman Green
Odyssey: ref (nothing posted here is as a ref)
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Squire
Group: Basic Members
Last Login: Yesterday @ 2:03 PM
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Feud you say? *rolls up metaphorical, internet based sleeves*. Ideally sung as a duet between Helena and Jean I feel...
I got kills, they're multiplyin', and I'm losin' control
Cause the murder you're supplyin', my goddess is cryin’
You better stab me up, cause I need revenge,
and my goddess is set on you
You better stab me up, you better understand,
to my goddess I must be true
Nothing to lose, it’s just me or you
You're the one that I want (dead) etc
Maelstrom: Blind Harvey, Rimici Capell Future Prospects
Serenity: Sparks, bitter divorcee and mechanic.
Insurrection: A series of short-lived trouble makers.
Odyssey: Ramses, Keeper of the Goats, The Khemenethorus
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Heroic Knight
Group: Basic Members
Last Login: Yesterday @ 7:13 PM
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While we're on the theme of Grease, here's one I made earlier. I like to call it, "Aestar's Song".
There are worse things I could do,
Than devour a soul or two.
Even though the neighborhood thinks I'm trashy,
And no good,
I suppose it could be true,
But there are worse things I could do.
I could flirt with all the guys,
Smile at them and bat my eyes.
Press against them when we dance,
Make them think they stand a chance,
Then refuse to see it through.
That's a thing I'd never do.
I could stay in the Maelstrom every night,
Waiting for the God that's right.
Listen for prayers every day,
And throw my life away,
On a dream that won't come true.
I could hurt someone like me,
Out of spite or jealousy.
I don't steal and I don't lie,
But I can feel and I can cry.
A fact I'll bet you never knew.
But to cry in front of you,
That's the worst thing I could do.
--------------------------------
Varas II - This time it's personal
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Champion
Group: Basic Members
Last Login: Yesterday @ 7:37 PM
Posts: 319,
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Tim: 
How about some ignorant prejudice about natives?
In the jungle, the mighty jungle, they're lying out of sight...
In the jungle, the mighty jungle, they're hiding through the night...
(All together now)The Hunapha, the Hunapha, the Hunapha, the Hunapha, the Hunapha, the Hunapha, the Hunapha, the Hunapha... OOOOoooooo Ooo Ooo Oo Oo Oo Oooooo, OOOOOOOOOOoooooo Ooo Ooo Oo Oo Oo Oooooo
RL: Daisy
Maelstrom: Piper Arteman Green
Odyssey: ref (nothing posted here is as a ref)
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Heroic Knight
Group: Basic Members
Last Login: Monday, August 23, 2010 11:53 AM
Posts: 204,
Visits: 1,405
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This is probably disqualified on the grounds that I did, in fact, sing it IC. And still have all my limbs.
Title: Aestar, Aestar (To the tune of 'Daisy, Daisy')
Aestar, Aestar
What am I gonna do?
I've gone crazy
Coz I had sex with you
You had an odd vagina
Like a squid got stuck inside ya
When I went down
I almost drowned
And now I'm too scared to screw!
--
Maelstrom: Captain Rufus Oakwood, Viscount Campbell and Master of New Nordon, New Malathian Ambassador to the Colonies, Husband to Twig. If you need to find me, look for the flash of green zooming past with a somewhat harrased expression.
Odyssey: Nebkharesemraby, Nomarch of Am-Khent
Insurrection: Justin of the Dawning Light
EOS: Feral Ferret, Mystwalker Lunatic!!!
RL: Robin the Stoat!!!
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Champion
Group: Eos Staff
Last Login: Yesterday @ 8:04 PM
Posts: 261,
Visits: 3,055
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*cough *cough* died laughing...
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
PD: Mr Elbow
Retired:Justice - Dreadlord of the Fallen
EOS: Staff
LT: Mercutio - Guild Master of the Incantors Guild - Champion of the Dark Faiths of Edreja
Odessey: Warlord Ba'al-Akeen Hannon of the Hannon Souk - Great Autocrator of Carthage
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Apprentice
Group: Basic Members
Last Login: Thursday, August 26, 2010 4:46 PM
Posts: 23,
Visits: 166
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You said highly bad right....
Buddy you're a man make a big noise
Fightin' in the New World gonna be a dead man some day
Cos you got blood on your hands
You've killed a man
And we'll kill you if we can
We will we will stab you
We will we will stab you
Maelstrom - Hessonite. Orange facet has questions.
CUTT - Ref 2009/10
Odyessy - Some egyptian.
Insurrection - Some human.
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